These cards are good for starting the conversation and giving a visual representation of how much each partner in the relationship is carrying. The rules of the "game" don't always make sense, however. For example, the rules say that cards cannot be shared. But it is terrible parenting to assign discipline to one parent. That should not be only one parent. And yet, the rules say it should be only one parent holding the card. My husband and I got around this by having a pile for him, a pile for me and a pile for shared. This then got us talking about what cards SHOULD be shared but currently were not being shared, such as only one partner disciplining the children or only one partner initiating romance. It's also puzzling why some things are a card and others are not. For example, dry cleaning is its own card, even though many households rarely or never dry clean things. But household cleaning is only 1 card-- all the cleaning. So, do they have value? Yes, they're good for facilitating communication. But you might need to just use them the way that makes sense for you and your partner.

Making a game of tedious tasks is always a good strategy. This deck has it's pros and cons, but the pros definitely outweigh the cons. It's a great way to start a conversation about the distribution of work in a household. Communication is key, and no one wants to feel criticized or as if they're not contributing enough. It's so easy to feel like a failure when simple chores are left unfinished because no one takes up the task in a timely manner, leaving an issue area like a few dishes or dust bunnies to grow into an overwhelming task. With these cards divided up, there's no question about who is doing what and when. It suddenly becomes clear just how much each person is taking on, and if anything, helps everyone appreciate the mutual effort of keeping things running smoothly. It's still often the case that the "mental load" of a household falls on women. As an article from Forbes on this very subject puts it: "It’s having to remember to pick up eggs. Even if you ask someone else to buy eggs, it’s you then checking that the eggs were in fact bought. It’s essentially project management. And when it’s at work, that’s what we call it. Project management. Or just management. It’s a whole job. Yet when it’s at home, we call it, well, we don’t really have a word for it." The micro-tasks that stack up throughout any given day shouldn't fall to one person or one gender in a household, and this deck attempts to even that playing field. Pros: ★Conversation starter (positive communication is key) ★Making a game of tedious tasks is always a good strategy ★Assist in the even distribution of household work and "mental load" ★Make clear who is doing what and when in a household ★Foster appreciation between members of a household Cons: ★More couple-centric versus family-centric or household-centric ★Many cards (almost half of the deck) for child rearing (these can just be pulled from the deck and kept in the box for childless households). Maybe a future installment of these cards could be further divided, so the child rearing cards can actually be expanded upon and purchased separately. This would make the set more approachable for different households and living arrangements, other than a nuclear family. ★★★★★

My husband and I liked this deck. We did end up splitting it across 3 nights - more time consuming than I expected! It was worth it. As expected, I was doing... Everything. Thankfully my husband was eager to take as many cards as he could. At one point he even said, I love getting to spend time with you and it was nice to do this. My deck was still bigger than his in the end and that's ok. Taking all the cooking and dishes and half the cleaning of my plate is huge. We did make a separate set of "cards" of our own for cleaning. It is just one card and we didn't want one person to do it all. It would be nice if they broke that down a bit more into "vacuuming", "bathroom", etc., but I get that that would get to be a lot of cards.

Communication is strong with these cards for couples to prioritize. Perfect for every couple.

These should be required by law for every long term, bonded relationship between consenting adults.

My wife and I used this for divvying up our household tasks. Everything came out fair and even, and we’ve continued the same task list for the past couple of years.