I came across "Never Split the Difference" by Chris Voss while browsing Amazon, where it was featured as a top seller in the Business & Money section. Out of the 13 books I've read in 2024, this one stands out as the best—easily a 10 out of 10. The book provides practical advice applicable to various areas of life, whether you're a parent, partner, manager, or entrepreneur. It's a must-read for anyone, particularly those involved in business development, people management, freelancing, or parenting—essentially, anyone looking to enhance their negotiation skills. After reading the book, my favorite ChatGPT prompt has become: "I want…. given [plenty of background]. Advise me in line with the book: Never Split the Difference." Even with a hectic schedule over the past month, I found myself looking forward to my nightly reading sessions, regardless of how tired I was. This speaks volumes about the book's captivating and insightful content. The structure of the book is good, with each chapter concluding with a summary that highlights the key points. Some of my favorite quotes from the book include: - “Prepare, prepare, prepare. When the pressure is on, you don’t rise to the occasion; you fall to your highest level of preparation.” - “Never be so sure of what you want that you wouldn’t take something better.” In summary, "Never Split the Difference" is an insightful and invaluable resource that I highly recommend to everyone.

Sometimes I feel like I buy books more often than I actually read book. It's not that I don't like reading, I do. I also love the idea of reading. That said, this book was something that once I started reading, I couldn't put down. Chris Voss is a master in the art of negotiation, and his steps are both simple enough to follow and understand, but also tied to real world examples he talks about. In every chapter he talks about some of his biggest failures and greatest successes, and how he took to negotiation and the concepts that came with it. If you want a story, while I was reading this book, I was going through a very tough point in my career. For several years I had worked in a department that was basically seen as the baby in the company, on a side-project that while lucrative had just 30 clients where our main products had over 1,000. My boss for years barely noticed me or what we did in our department, he managed two products himself, the bigger of the two in the larger customer base. For 3 years, I basically ran everything in the department, doing what I needed to do, being the go-to for people well above my role in anything my product needed. I enjoyed it. Eventually the company started to take note of this products success, and wanted to ramp it up. My boss, eager to take credit for the departments success, started taking a more active role, despite having almost little to no understanding of what we actually did. He was making questionable decisions and often impossible requests that highlighted just how little he knew. He was impossible to work with in this, because he was very much a my-way-or-the-highway kind of guy when it came to management, and would get frustrated by anything other than a firm yes to a request. In short, he was tanking the department I sunk my last 3 years in, and making my life miserable having to constantly either shoulder or make up for his unusual requests. Everything became a fight, including at one point a simple request for me to focus my time on a large project for a client I was traveling to visit in 3 days became a no (because it wasn't his idea) and ended with him hurling papers around the room and throwing me out of his office. He was a bad manager, a traffic cop who you'd only hear from when he thought you were doing something wrong, but like many people can relate to, he was also *my* manager, and he wasn't going anywhere. I had to do something about it. The book had many situations that related to the situation I was going into. A stubborn, unreasonable person, but at least they weren't holding anyone at random. In many ways, I was doing things that may have seemed like to my boss that I was undermining him. Chris Voss talks about the same story of a brilliant young agent who earned the ire of a field office director (and that agents direct supervisor) for a similar situation. Chris talked about a situation where the agent came to him for help in needing to discuss with their boss a request they knew would have sank like a lead balloon on any good day. I was in that same situation. Chris described the techniques needed to discuss the issue with their boss. It worked. I tried the same techniques. The next time an impossible request came through, I discussed it with my manager. I started with "I'm sorry," one of the things Chris talks about in his book. I followed in so many words with "how am I supposed to do that?" I made my problem *his* problem. It was now his job and his responsibility to solve the issue he presented in his request. All without him knowing that just happened. It sounds so deceptively stupid, I thought starting off with "I'm sorry" and asking "how am I supposed to do that?" would be seen as oppositional, but you know what? It actually worked. He didn't know how to solve the problem he just gave me. We talked about it and floated solutions, and I planted the seeds in his head on alternatives, using other techniques described in the book. The discussion ended with him basically saying "that's right" and I got the solution I wanted out of the situation, and in the end, my boss left with the impression that it was his idea. That manager and I still never got along very well, and eventually he moved away from my department completely, but at least I had the tools needed for him and I to be able to communicate and work together. I'd have to thank Chriss Voss. The techniques in my book in my situation didn't save anybody's life from a kidnapper or get a bank robber to stand down, but it probably saved my career. This book is for everybody.

Everything we assumed we knew was wrong” (p.26), we are not rational, compromise is terrible, and “No” is the answer to getting what you want in and out of the office. These are all concepts that the reader can be expected to wholeheartedly believe and understand by the end of this book. Former FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss hit the mark with this book, sharing effective tips and tools for negotiating in and beyond your workspace. “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as Your Life Depends on It” is a 5-star read for those trying to enhance their “deal making skills” whether that be with work or personal relationships. Prior to 2008, Chris Voss was the lead international kidnapping negotiator for the FBI. According to The Black Swan Group, through his 28 year with the Bureau, he was trained in negotiation by the FBI, Scotland Yard and Harvard Law School. Chris has taught business negotiation in the MBA program in several of the world’s best universities and business programs. Voss continues to host seminars and attend guest lectures and is rumored to be working on additional books. “Never Split the Difference”, a euphemism for “never compromise” because compromise on the street often leads to the loss of lives, Was published in May of 2016 and is an extremely powerful book that tells the stories of negotiation when you really can’t afford to lose, like in a situation where you are negotiating for the lives of others. Each chapter includes engaging theories on communication and actionable recommendations on how to improve your communication skills, while telling intriguing stories of the life of an FBI agent. These stories include bank robberies, terrorists and a bunch of different “bad guys”. This book will not only help your business deals, but your personal relationships as well. Voss gives us more than just the advice on what to do, he shows us why they work as well. This book is a fun read full of useful information. The new concepts in every chapter had me highlighting the techniques and lessons that I truly wanted to remember. The most important to me, being that you should never be so eager to solve a conflict that’s result is inconvenient for you. Accepting bad deals is almost always a mistake. Compromise isn’t always the answer, while pushing for a hard “yes” doesn’t get you any closer to a victory, it only angers the other party. And finally, “Driving towards “that's right” is a winning strategy in all negotiations. But hearing “you're right” is a disaster.” (p. 105) Overall this is a wonderful book that teaches the reader that negotiation, at its core, is nothing more than conversations with reactions and results. Getting what you need from others will help set up the rest of your life. Chriss Voss will teach you how to take authority and show dominance in the conversations that will make or break your career. Because of the strong lessons in this book, I believe it would be a great book for most young people to read. Whether they are beginning their college career or creating their own blue-collar business, “Never Split the Difference” by Chris Voss is a great resource for people looking to better their life without looking for a designated “self-help” book. Remember: “... without self-control and emotional regulation…” (p 156) these strategies will not work.